HERE IT IS... THE FINAL ANSWER

I figured it out. My problem. Well, at least one of them. Here goes.

When talking to a specific girl online, I find that since I generally have time to collect all of my thoughts before writing something to her, I have this uncanny (at least I think/hope so) ability to be funny, confident, flirtatious, etc. But as soon as I get face to face with her, or any girl for that matter, I fall apart and suck at everything. I don't know why this is, but it sucks regardless. I'm sure this is something that every guy finds they can do in the online world as opposed to the real world. But shit, man. It just sucks.

The other problem is that I don't really know how to fix this problem to the point where I'm top of the line on both regards (for me, anyways). If that means thinking every word through before I say them, that leads to lots of pauses in real life conversation. Then I'd just look like a dumbass.

It's definitly one of those situations where I unknowingly made the mistake of become friends with a girl that I really liked without showing interest in that respect. On the other hand, isn't that what you're fucking supposed to do? I don't know. I'm not really asking for advice, because I know that all people will tell me is to calm down and act natural, but that doesn't fucking work. Everyone's always telling me to not let it get to me, or not to care. It does get to me, I do care. Call me a complainer, but I'm 19 years old, and I've never actually had any sort of relationship. The only one I have had doesn't count, because it was real and local for about six days, and then became a long distance BS relationship that was all in my head. Bottom line, I cared for her twenty or so times more than she cared for me. (Read back about 8 months, you'll find it.)

Okay, I'm done complaining about how I can't get girls. I'll just keep thinking what I always am told to think about the situation. College (REAL COLLEGE, NOT COD) will be better.

Take care of yourself by not thinking too much.

Ke\/in.